Hidden Traps of Collaboration And How to Overcome Them 🚀Supercommunicators! Why Listening Isn’t Enough 💡

Collaboration is the lifeblood of any organization, yet we’ve all experienced moments when it just doesn’t click. 🤔 Teams talk past each other, great ideas get lost in the noise, and the results don’t match the effort.

So, what goes wrong?

And more importantly, how can we fix it?

Recently, I had the opportunity to explore these challenges in a keynote for Eurowings ✈️ as part of Leadership Choices’ ongoing collaboration with Lufthansa.

The session was designed to tackle cross-functional teamwork and create space for real conversations about what helps—and hinders—effective cross functional collaboration. While the morning started off with low energy (thanks to a rocking 🎶birthday celebration the night before! 🎉), we quickly found our rhythm through structured input, interventions and dynamic World Café discussions ☕💬

Three Surprising Collaboration Pitfalls 🧐

My keynote + workshop sessions drew inspiration from Charles Duhigg’s Supercommunicators 📖 and Patrick Lencioni’s trust-based teamwork model 🤝

Here are three unexpected barriers to collaboration that surfaced, along with strategies to overcome them:

1. The Listening Illusion: Why We Think We Hear Each Other (But Don’t) 👂❌

Many of us pride ourselves on being good listeners. But Duhigg’s research suggests that most of the time, we’re not truly listening—we’re just waiting for our turn to speak. In a fast-paced work environment, this can lead to misunderstandings, shallow discussions, and missed opportunities.

What to do instead: Try looping for understanding (repeating back what you think you heard) before responding. This small shift ensures clarity and signals genuine engagement.

2. “Conversational Charades”: The Assumption Trap 🎭

Ever had a conversation where you walked away thinking, That went well, only to find out later that the other person had a completely different takeaway? That’s because we often assume we’re having the same kind of conversation—practical, emotional, or relational—when in reality, we’re playing by different rules.

What to do instead: Before diving into solutions, clarify what type of conversation is needed. Is this about facts and decisions? 🧠 Understanding emotions? ❤️ Strengthening a relationship? 🤝 Getting aligned from the start prevents frustrating miscommunications.

3. The “Zone of Productive Discomfort”: Why Tension Can Be a Good Thing

Most people see tension in a conversation as a bad sign—something to be avoided or smoothed over. But high-performing teams don’t fear discomfort; they use it. True collaboration happens when people feel just uncomfortable enough to challenge ideas while still feeling psychologically safe to speak up. This includes acknowledging and navigating emotions rather than suppressing them.

What to do instead: Leaders can set the tone by welcoming dissent and modeling emotional awareness. 🌟 Rather than shutting down disagreement, reframe it as a way to deepen trust and sharpen decision-making. 🛠️

Moving from Awareness to Action

By the afternoon, the large group of 55 was actively exchanging insights, tackling collaboration challenges, and experimenting with new ways to work across functions. It was a powerful reminder that effective collaboration isn’t about avoiding friction, it’s about learning to work with it. 🔥

What have been your biggest collaboration challenges? Have you ever experienced a case of Conversational Charades or fallen into the Listening Illusion?

I’d love to hear your thoughts! Reach out to schedule a free consultation with me Karla Schlaepfer: info@designchange.de

Karla Schlaepfer