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Leadership Lab: When Being Smart Isn’t EnoughThe Emotional Intelligence Advent Gift

Find highlights in DE and EN at the end

Welcome to your fresh DesignChange edition, delivered every 2nd Tuesday at 8am to forward-thinking leaders like you!

Have you ever noticed how some leaders drain the energy from a room while others lift it?

The difference isn’t personality, brains or strategy.

It’s emotional awareness (EQ) ⚡

A senior manager recently confessed to me: “I thought I was being efficient. Turns out, I was just being cold.”

She’d spent years climbing the ladder by staying “professional.” Facts only. Minimal emotion. Quick decisions.

But her team wasn’t performing. People left. Projects stalled.

She blamed everything except the real issue: emotional blindness.

Her competence was never the problem. Her inability to connect was.

🎯 The Invisible Cost of Low Emotional Intelligence

Low emotional intelligence (EQ) doesn’t announce itself. It creeps in through everyday behaviors that poison culture.

As documented in Emotional Intelligence 2.0, over 90% of top performers have high EQ. Yet many leaders—especially under stress—operate with dangerous EQ blind spots.

Consider these patterns:

Defensive reactions to feedback. When critique feels like an attack, growth stops.

Control disguised as “high standards.” Trust dies under micromanagement.

Explaining away mistakes. Accountability vanishes.

Conflict avoidance. Difficult conversations never happen. Problems fester.

Hiding behind data. Human concerns get dismissed as “soft.”

These patterns frustrate teams and leaders alike. They’re also avoidable.

Here are some proven ways to improve your emotional intelligence.

💡 LeadershipLab Tip: The EQ Awareness Practice

Your 5-Minute Daily Reset

Building emotional intelligence starts with one thing: awareness.

A Simple Daily Practice for EQ Awareness

Inspired by habit expert James Clear, try these micro-practices:

Emotional Check-In: Set hourly reminders. Name what you’re feeling—not “stressed“ or “fine.” Get specific: frustrated? disappointed? anxious? Naming builds awareness.

Reaction Review: After any strong reaction, ask: What triggered that? Your triggers reveal your emotional landscape.

Body Scan: Notice physical signals before emotions explode. Tension in shoulders? Jaw clenching? Stomach tightening? Your body knows first.

Impact Question: After important interactions, ask yourself: How might that have landed for them? This shifts you from intent to impact.

Pattern Journal: Write down one emotional moment each day. Patterns emerge over time.

Self-awareness isn’t instant. It’s built through small, repeated observations. Like compound interest💰 these tiny habits grow exponentially.

🤖 The Provocative Question: Can A Coachbot – MirandAI – Have Emotional Intelligence?

The honest answer? No. And yes.

MirandAI doesn’t feel your anxiety before a difficult conversation.

It can’t experience the joy when things go well like I do 😊

But here’s something this Coachbot offers which is very useful; a rehearsal room.

Last week, one beta tester told me:

“I practiced saying the hard thing five different ways. Each time, MirandAI asked what I was really trying to say and even why. By the time I had the actual feedback conversation, I knew what I meant, and how to say it.”

The advantage?

You can pause mid-thought when engaging with the bot. Walk away. Come back an hour later. Try again.

No one’s waiting. No one’s judging your hesitation. No social pressure to “get it right” on the first attempt.

MirandAI Coachbot won’t avoid uncomfortable questions. It won’t rush you. It just “waits” without emotional contagion.

You set the pace.

Not emotional intelligence. But rather emotional clarity through reflection.

🌟What Is this Coachbot MirandAI?

In case you missed this 😉

MirandAI is my hybrid “Reflect and Act Coachbot” giving your 24/7 support between our live coaching sessions. Here in short:

Built on my 25+ years of executive coaching and educational experience, ICF ethical standards, my books and values, it helps you for example:

EU-safe. GDPR-compliant. Responsible AI. Confidential and Private.

This is not a replacement for human coaching. It’s a bridge between sessions.

Currently in beta testing with early adopter leaders. 2026 increasing the scope of MirandAI competencies to include coaching skills in L&D. Exciting stuff to come!

🎯 Read the whitepaper here to find out more!

🎁 Advent Gift: Your EQ Self-Assessment

Because emotional intelligence (EQ) matters so much, I’m giving my German readers a little love this December💞

This isn’t another personality quiz.

It’s a short practical reflection tool to spot your EQ strengths and blind spots in four key areas: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management.

🎄💞🎁 P D F Link DE EQ Reflection ❄️🕯️🌟

Consider it my thank you for reading 🌿

🔆 Get Ready! More Human AI Masterclass Returns in 2026

The “More Human” masterclass with Dr. Richard Grillenbeck will return in 2026 with new dates and formats.

We’re refining the experience based on the powerful feedback from our 2025 sessions!

If you want early notification when registration opens, reach out and mention your interest.

🤝 Let’s Connect

Ready to develop your emotional intelligence? Curious about hybrid coaching with MirandAI?

Book a complimentary consultation here

I’d love to hear how the EQ Awareness Practice works for you!

Cheers and warm wishes 🌟

Karla Schlaepfer and the fabulous DesignChange Team

Emotional intelligence isn’t about being nice. It’s about being aware.

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